If you have a partner who thrives on words of affirmation, they don't necessarily want to be showered with compliments so much as they want to hear you say "thank you" for taking care of the dishes after dinner-or "I appreciate you" when they wake up early to walk the dog. This love language is all about recognition. "A person who speaks the language of affirmation connects deeply to their partner’s words." “In this case, words matter," says Carolina Pataky, PhD, a relationship and sex therapist and co-founder of the Love Discovery Institute. Those who "speak" this language feel most connected to their partner or others after hearing after a few kind words. Words Of AffirmationĪs the saying typically goes, "It's not about what you say but what you do"-but that's not so true for people whose love language is words of affirmation. ![]() In that spirit, it's worth learning what your love language is so you can better identify what actions make you feel special-and identifying what your partner's is so that you can cater to it. “I believe it has applicability to friendships and work relationships too in terms of how to do things for people that they will value and appreciate, and also how to communicate your own needs for nurturance and support, romantic or not,” says Judy Ho, PhD, licensed clinical neuropsychologist. ![]() The idea behind identifying your love language (and your partner's) is for them to help romantic partners better understand each other and maintain healthy relationships-though they can be utilized for all thoughtful connections in your life. One can determine how someone likes to receive love, for example, while the other might speak to how a person likes to show love. Though some people may fall completely into one category, a person can also strongly identify with two of the love languages. ![]() “Over time, couples can feel that they are both making a sincere effort to show love to their partner, yet somehow end up missing each other and feeling distant.” Each encompasses a specific way a person may need to express or receive love. The five love languages clearly demonstrate these unique characteristics.įirst introduced by marriage counselor Gary Chapman in his book The 5 Love Languages, they “provide an easy way to curate a conversation about meeting one another's needs in a relationship,” says Indigo Stray Conger, licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist. Have you ever talked with a friend about relationships and been shocked to hear how different what they want from a partner is? It’s easy to fall for the idea that everyone expresses and receives love in similar ways but, in reality, individuals have distinct desires, wants, and needs from life, and others.
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